Dream, Ponder, and Pray

This morning I had a dream so realistic that I could scarcely believe how detailed it was. Justin and I were living in a small townhome. It was white and minimalistic with lots of windows. I wasn’t sure what any of us had done or said, but for some reason each of us were in danger and were trying to escape the city where we were living.

Justin came home from work one day and revealed to me that we were being watched. Sure enough, I could see a few men and a woman through the windows, watching the house from all sides. I accidentally made eye contact with the woman and faked a casual smile.

Justin told me that friends were trying to make arrangements for us to escape, and that we had to be ready to leave at any moment. Family members and friends who either knew about the plan or knew we needed help came over to help offer a distraction to the watchers and babysit while I inconspicuously gathered clothing and essentials.

Justin told me he was taking me to the store to get more supplies, and I left the kids with the friends and family members thinking I would be back soon. After a while of driving we drove near two sets of train tracks, and at that moment the two trains began to intersect from opposite directions. I said that those trains probably would have offered the perfect distraction needed to escape. Justin didn’t say anything, but as the first train passed he suddenly flipped a u-turn, and we were now traveling on a dirt path between the tracks. I think at that point I knew what was happening, but somehow I wasn't worried.

We arrived at a different house, and I was sneaked out through the side to a garage where I was hiding with a couple more people. Justin had to leave again, and I didn’t see him for the rest of the dream.

More watchers appeared around the neighborhood, though they couldn’t see exactly which house we were hiding in.

Several minutes passed, and another car pulled into a connecting garage. My children were immediately ushered out of that car into the one I was in (which I think was a station wagon with tinted windows), and I was filled with simultaneous relief and anxiety for the safety of my children. I remember feeling slightly struck at how small their backpacks were. It could have fit one, maybe two pairs of clothes in all.

From there we drove to an empty school parking lot, where we waited in tense silence for several minutes. Then another vehicle showed up that looked like an old cross between a van and a small SUV, and all of us were ushered into that vehicle by the driver, who looked and sounded Pakistani-American from my guess. Lydia however started crying and squirming when she was put into the back of the car with us, and actually climbed out of the car, and the man began yelling and panicking that if she drew attention she could get us all killed.

I was worried and scared for Lydia, and I didn’t know if we were going to be able to successfully escape. And then… I woke up.


I have a lot of thoughts and experiences I have been meaning to write down here, but this one is something I need to pray about and ponder I think. Maybe it was meant to show me what other people in the world are going through. Maybe it’s to reassure me that it’s okay to entrust my children with others. I don’t know. I have a lot to think about.